Top 5 on LifesBestAdvice.com …
Find three hobbies you love:
One to make you money,
one to keep you in shape,
and one to be creative.
Inspirational
“More than education, more than experience, more than training, a person’s level of resilience will determine who succeeds and who fails.
From an article in Harvard Business Review titled How Resilience Works
“More than education, more than experience, more than training, a person’s level of resilience will determine who succeeds and who fails. That’s true in the cancer ward, it’s true in the Olympics, and it’s true in the boardroom.”
Want to be happier? Stay in the moment
Matt Killingsworth, Happiness researcher TED.com video titled Want to be happier? Stay in the moment …
“Among the surprising results: We’re often happiest when we’re lost in the moment. And the flip side: The more our mind wanders, the less happy we can be.
As it turns out, people are substantially less happy when their minds are wandering than when they’re not. Now you might look at this result and say, okay, sure, on average people are less happy when they’re mind-wandering, but surely when their minds are straying away from something that wasn’t very enjoyable to begin with, at least then mind-wandering should be doing something good for us. Nope. As it turns out, people are less happy when they’re mind-wandering no matter what they’re doing. For example, people don’t really like commuting to work very much. It’s one of their least enjoyable activities, and yet they are substantially happier when they’re focused only on their commute than when their mind is going off to something else. It’s amazing.”
It is your responsibility to make your dreams come true
From a post titled Take Responsibility for Your Dreams written by Yvonne Kariba …
“Most people expect the things they desire to be handed to them without much effort on their part or have convinced themselves to believe the lie that promotes over-night success.
We have to stop waiting for people to make things happen for us or to point out and recognize our greatness so that we can feel more comfortable pursuing our dreams. We have to be willing to sail unchartered waters and walk the less traveled road at times as well as bet on ourselves if we are ever bring our dreams to pass no matter how fearful, unqualified or unprepared we might feel.”
The greatest discovery of my generation is that a human being can alter his life by altering his attitudes.
The quote comes from Harvard psychologist William James. The advice below is from a post by Brian Knight titled The Power of Attitude …
“Your attitude is one of the few things in life over which you have total control. Harvard psychologist Williams James: “The greatest discovery of my generation is that a human being can alter his life by altering his attitudes of mind.” If you want to perform at your best, and if you want to maximize your happiness and fulfillment, then you must take control of the life-shaping power of your attitude. Please understand: developing and sustaining a positive attitude is not merely a quick-fix motivational technique. It is a disciplined skill that must be practiced and learned.”
Courage is not the absence of fear but rather the judgement that something is more important than fear
Post by Lisa Dungate titled Courage is Not the Absence of Fear …
“As parents, sometimes we need to call in reinforcements, ask for help ourselves, and make friends with our own fears so we can be present, brave, and our child’s own personal hero or heroine. As parents, we are the light that can shine when our child’s world seems dark, when the monsters under the bed give fright, and no one at school seems friendly.
I remind myself each day that having courage does not necessarily end worry or disappear fear. Courage is the catalyst by which we move beyond fear and into faith. We may not know exactly the right words to say when our child is sad or anxious or unhappy. But, we can decide to push aside our petty worries and pernicious fears. We can tell stories from our own life to offer comfort and perhaps even some inspiration. We can hold their hand and just breathe together through the pain and confusion.”
Think Big. Start Small. Act Now.
From an article titled THE ALL-AROUND WISDOM OF “THINK BIG, START SMALL, ACT NOW”
“THINK BIG. START SMALL. ACT NOW.”
That statement has stuck with me.
It is a simple and logical idea, really. With whatever you want to achieve in life, you should aim high and remove any false ceilings. But you should also acknowledge that any path to “big” involves starting “small” — taking a series of steps to move you gradually closer to your end goal. And even those steps begin with some kind of action, so why wait to begin?
The Simple Phrase that Increases Effort 40%
From New York Times bestselling author Daniel Coyle’s Talent Code Blog …
“To their surprise, researchers discovered that there was one particular type of teacher feedback that improved student effort and performance so much that they deemed it “magical.” Students who received this feedback chose to revise their paper far more often that students who did not (a 40 percent increase among white students; 320 percent boost among black students) and improved their performance significantly. (See the study here.)
What was the magical feedback?
Just one phrase:
I’m giving you these comments because I have very high expectations and I know that you can reach them.
That’s it. Just 19 words. But they’re powerful because they are not really feedback. They’re a signal that creates something more powerful: a sense of belonging and connection.
Looking closer, the phrase contains several distinct signals:
1) You are part of this group.
2) This group is special; we have higher standards here.
3) I believe you can reach those standards.”
Losing Is Good for You
By Ashley Merryman, the co-author of the book “Top Dog: The Science of Winning and Losing,” and author of a recent NY Times Opinion piece “Losing is Good For You”
“In life, “you’re going to lose more often than you win, even if you’re good at something,” Ms. Twenge told me. “You’ve got to get used to that to keep going.”
“our job should not be to spin those losses into decorated victories. Instead, our job is to help kids overcome setbacks, to help them see that progress over time is more important than a particular win or loss”
You have to appreciate the gifts that every day of your life will bring: Your family. Your friends. A beautiful sky at sunset. A perfect ear of corn in August. The first snowfall of the year. A baby’s tiny hand. Be grateful for the time you have and savor the joy that comes your way.
Katie Couric, TV Journalist …
“The losses I’ve experienced have taught me something else: We are all terminal. You have to appreciate the gifts that every day of your life will bring: Your family. Your friends. A beautiful sky at sunset. A perfect ear of corn in August. The first snowfall of the year. A baby’s tiny hand. Be grateful for the time you have and savor the joy that comes your way.
The more a person is committed to a goal … the more negative compared with positive feedback will be efficient.
From a post titled “When Is a Negative a Positive?” on Freakonomics.com.
Ayelet Fishbach of the University of Chicago …
“The more a person is committed to a goal — and by that I mean the more someone thinks that they absolutely have to do it, they like doing it, it’s important for them to do it — the more negative compared with positive feedback will be efficient”
Heidi Grant Halvorson, associate director of the Motivation Science Center at the Columbia Business School …
“Look, doling out negative feedback is not fun. It’s embarrassing. We feel terrible. We feel guilty. So we love hearing, ‘Hey, maybe I don’t have to give negative feedback,’ ‘Maybe I can just say positive things!’ ‘If I just keep saying positive things, then somehow this person will work to their fullest potential and everything will turn out fine.’ And that just turns out to not be the case.”
These people love what they do, but they didn’t follow their passion down the road to job satisfaction — they brought it with them.
From Mike Rowe, host of “Dirty Jobs” from The Best (and Worst) Graduation Advice You Never Heard…
“That earlier bit about ‘not following your passion’ doesn’t mean that you should take a job you’re not passionate about. It means you should be passionate about whatever job you take. And if you aren’t, act like you are anyway. Get in early. Stay late. Always volunteer for the skut work. If I’ve learned anything from Dirty Jobs, it’s that meaningful work can be found anywhere — sewers, maggot farms, funeral homes, oil rigs. I’ve met hundreds of very successful entrepreneurs who go home every day covered in crap. Literal, actual crap. These people love what they do, but they didn’t follow their passion down the road to job satisfaction — they brought it with them.”
“Sometimes quitting is strategic, and sometimes it can be your best possible plan”
From the a podcast titled “The Upside of Quitting” on Freakononmics.com …
“To help us understand quitting, we look at a couple of key economic concepts in this episode: sunk cost and opportunity cost. Sunk cost is about the past – it’s the time or money or sweat equity you’ve put into a job or relationship or a project, and which makes quitting hard. Opportunity cost is about the future. It means that for every hour or dollar you spend on one thing, you’re giving up the opportunity to spend that hour or dollar on something else – something that might make your life better. If only you weren’t so worried about the sunk cost. If only you could …. quit.”
‘If today were the last day of my life, would I want to do what I am about to do today?’ And whenever the answer has been “no” for too many days in a row, I know I need to change something.”
From a commencement address delivered by Steve Jobs, CEO of Apple Computer and of Pixar Animation Studios, on June 12, 2005 …
When I was 17, I read a quote that went something like: “If you live each day as if it was your last, someday you’ll most certainly be right.” It made an impression on me, and since then, for the past 33 years, I have looked in the mirror every morning and asked myself: “If today were the last day of my life, would I want to do what I am about to do today?” And whenever the answer has been “No” for too many days in a row, I know I need to change something.
Remembering that I’ll be dead soon is the most important tool I’ve ever encountered to help me make the big choices in life. Because almost everything — all external expectations, all pride, all fear of embarrassment or failure – these things just fall away in the face of death, leaving only what is truly important. Remembering that you are going to die is the best way I know to avoid the trap of thinking you have something to lose. You are already naked. There is no reason not to follow your heart.
“Let them know, in word and action, “I am behind you, I know you can do it!”
Parenting advice by Dr. Lisa Chu The many ways to say, “You CAN do it!” …
“I’m saying it so that you hear my belief in your spirit, in your ability to find it in yourself to do whatever it is you need to do, to take whatever time you need to, and to be wherever you are right now. I’ll be right here to witness you – to celebrate with you, and to catch you when you fall – as you learn to trust yourself.”
A post by Dr. Dave Currie titled Raising Confident and Secure Children …
“Build you kids up. Believe in them. Be their greatest fan. Let them know, in word and action, I am behind you, I know you can do it!”
From Dr. Michele Borba’s book The Big Book of Parenting Solutions …
You might say, “I know you can do it. Hang in there.” Of course, when your son or daughter finds the task too difficult and quits, support them. Then help them recognize what they could do the next time so they do succeed.
“You can’t change what you don’t acknowledge”
From Dr. Phil’s book titled Life Strategies …
“Get real with yourself about your life and everybody in it. Be truthful about what isn’t working in your life. Stop making excuses and start making results.
If you’re unwilling to acknowledge a thought, circumstance, problem, condition, behavior, or emotion–if you won’t take ownership of your role in a situation–then you cannot and will not change it.”
“Life’s two most important questions are “Why?” and “Why not?” The trick is knowing which one to ask”
From a post titled The Best Advice Ever …
Understanding why we do certain things is the first step to change. Until we understand what motivates us, what we get from doing a particular behavior, there is no momentum to begin the change process. Likewise, by asking “Why not?” we begin assessing the risk versus reward aspect which can lead to bringing about productive change in our lives.
“Today is the only guarantee you get”
Villanova Commencement Address by Pulitzer Prize Winner Anna Quindlen …
“Get a life. Pick up the phone. Send an e-mail. Write a letter. Kiss your Mom. Hug your Dad. Get a life in which you are generous. Look around at the azaleas in the suburban neighborhood where you grew up; look at a full moon hanging silver in a black, black sky on a cold night. And realize that life is the best thing ever, and that you have no business taking it for granted.
I learned to live many years ago. Something really, really bad happened to me, something that changed my life in ways that, if I had my druthers, it would never have been changed at all. And what I learned from it is what, today, seems to be the hardest lesson of all. I learned to love the journey, not the destination. I learned that it is not a dress rehearsal, and that today is the only guarantee you get. I learned to look at all the good in the world and to try to give some of it back because I believed in it completely and utterly. And I tried to do that, in part, by telling others what I had learned. By telling them this:
Consider the lilies of the field. Look at the fuzz on a baby’s ear. Read in the backyard with the sun on your face. Learn to be happy. And think of life as a terminal illness because if you do you will live it with joy and passion, as it ought to be lived. Just keep your eyes and ears open, the classroom is everywhere. The exam comes at the very end. No man ever said on his deathbed, I wish I had spent more time at the office.”
“If you always do what you’ve always done, you’ll always get what you’ve always got”
From the book 7 Keys to Success by Will Edwards …
” … we need to notice what is working and what is not; and be prepared to change our approach in order to get what we want – that is the essence of flexibility.
A wise person once said, “If you always do what you’ve always done, you’ll always get what you’ve always got”. That is a wonderfully true statement – in other words, if you continue doing exactly what you are now doing, then don’t be surprised when you don’t see any increase or change in your results.”
“Life is not fair – get used to it”
Uplifting post from Lori Deschene titled 10 Reasons It’s Awesome Life’s Not Fair
“You may say life’s not fair—and I think you’d be right. But how does it serve us to dwell on that idea? Who benefits when we indulge bitterness, frustration, or anger? Or perhaps a better question is: who suffers?
I say we see we take this unavoidable truth and appreciate it for the possibilities it provides. Life isn’t fair, but that’s awesome because:
9. It encourages you to ask yourself the question: “Do I want to be a victim?” Every day we have countless opportunities to blame other people for situations in our lives. We can curse everyone from the mailman to the president for somehow screwing up our day. Or we can commit to taking responsibility for our future, and learn to repeatedly assess how we can accept and improve our life.
8. It reminds to appreciate what you have when you have it. It’s a harsh reality that you can lose anything at any time. Your boss could lay you off after a decade of loyal service; your husband could walk out the door even though you’ve been a faithful, loving wife. This tells me we need to cherish what we have at all times. And really, any reality that forces you to be present and grateful is a gift.
2. It allows you to experience really interesting situations (by Dani of Positively Present). Imagine if everything always went smoothly. You got everything you wanted, never struggled or dealt with hardships. Wouldn’t life be pretty boring? The “unfairness” we perceive in the world pushes us into unknown territory which makes everything more exciting, and gives us opportunities to stretch ourselves.”
Link to all 10 reasons
“You don’t know as much as you think you do. BUT you are capable of more than you can possibly imagine”
Advice is from Michael Hyatt to the Owen Graduate School of Management students and an inspiring response by Lindsey Nobles…
“What I love about these two simple sentences is that they get to the heart of the two things that have the ability to limit my success in life, and in leadership.
Pride And Fear.
I NEED to be reminded that I don’t know as much as I think I know. I need to approach my days with humility. I need to learn the art of listening with an open heart, and an open mind. And I NEED to be reminded that I am capable of more than I can would ever dare to imagine.
My fear limits my possibilities, my dreams, and my faith.”
“Don’t let someone become a priority in your life when you are just an option in theirs”
From the 7 Golden Rules of Life. The 1st rule …
“Don’t let someone become a priority in your life, when you are just an option in their life. Relationships work best when they are balanced.”
The 4th rule …
“When we wake up in the morning, we have two simple choices.
Go back to sleep and dream, or wake up and chase those dreams.
Choice is yours.”
List of all 7 rules
“And when you get the choice to sit it out or dance: I hope you dance”
Lyrics to the song “I Hope You Dance” by Leann Womack …
I hope you never lose your sense of wonder
You get your fill to eat
But always keep that hunger
May you never take one single breath for granted
God forbid love ever leave you empty handed
I hope you still feel small
When you stand by the ocean
Whenever one door closes, I hope one more opens
Promise me you’ll give fate a fighting chance
And when you get the choice to sit it out or dance
I hope you dance
I hope you never fear those mountains in the distance
Never settle for the path of least resistance
Living might mean taking chances
But they’re worth taking
Lovin’ might be a mistake
But it’s worth making
Don’t let some hell bent heart
Leave you bitter
When you come close to selling out
Reconsider
Give the heavens above
More than just a passing glance
And when you get the choice to sit it out or dance
I hope you dance
Life's Best Advice 