If things have been a little rocky between you and your boss lately, there’s one thing that’s sure to help you begin smoothing things out: ask them for their guidance.

Article by Patrick Allan titled Repair Your Relationship With Your Boss by Asking for Their Advice …

Whatever happened between the two of you, seeking your boss’s counsel is a good starting point for getting both you on each other’s side. As Jean-François Manzoni, professor of management practice at INSEAD, explains to Harvard Business Review, asking for someone’s advice shows that you respect their judgment and intellect. It makes them invest in you and gives them the notion that you’re willing to fall in behind them. All in all, it’s a good way to improve their opinion of you, says Manzoni.

…You don’t want them to think you’re putting your problems or work on them. So use phrases like “I’m asking for your guidance” and “I need some help thinking things through,” so they know you’re still willing to do the actual work yourself. And, most importantly, once you ask for their advice, make sure you follow through on it.

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Faking confidence is the key to becoming confident

Advice from Grace Killelea, author of the new book The Confidence Effect …

“Having confidence leads to other behaviors; like speaking up, raising your hand, taking risks, having a voice at the table,” she says.

“Faking it” doesn’t mean being inauthentic, but consciously practicing a skill until it becomes natural. “It’s like muscle memory. You have to practice, you have to get through the fear part of it, until it becomes a natural habit,” says Killelea.

 

Think Big. Start Small. Act Now.

From an article titled THE ALL-AROUND WISDOM OF “THINK BIG, START SMALL, ACT NOW”

“THINK BIG. START SMALL. ACT NOW.”

That statement has stuck with me.

It is a simple and logical idea, really. With whatever you want to achieve in life, you should aim high and remove any false ceilings. But you should also acknowledge that any path to “big” involves starting “small” — taking a series of steps to move you gradually closer to your end goal. And even those steps begin with some kind of action, so why wait to begin?

“If You’re the Best One in the Room, You’re in the Wrong Room”

Article titled If You’re the Best One in the Room, You’re in the Wrong Room by Eric Ravenscraft from LifeHacker.com …

It feels good to be the best. You get recognition, a sense of accomplishment, and hopefully compensation. If you’re the best person in the room, though, you’re probably not getting challenged anymore.

Being the worst person in the room gives you motivation to get better so you’re not on the bottom anymore. However, being the top of your class probably means it’s time to move on to another class. No matter where you are, as long as you’re not afraid to challenge yourself, you can continue to improve and make yourself more valuable to the room.

Don’t worry about things we’ve already lost

From an article by Belle Beth Cooper in Fast Company titled 8 SUBCONSCIOUS MISTAKES OUR BRAINS MAKE EVERY DAY–AND HOW TO AVOID THEM …

“The term sunk cost refers to any cost (not just monetary, but also time and effort) that has been paid already and cannot be recovered. So it’s a payment of time or money that’s gone forever, basically.”

“The reason we can’t ignore the cost, even though it’s already been paid, is that we are wired to feel loss far more strongly than gain.”

For instance, if you buy a movie ticket only to realize the movie is terrible, you could either:

A) stay and watch the movie, to “get your money’s worth” since you’ve already paid for the ticket (sunk-cost fallacy)

or

B) leave the cinema and use that time to do something you’ll actually enjoy.

The thing to remember is this: You can’t get that investment back. It’s gone. Don’t let it cloud your judgment in whatever decision you’re making in this moment–let it remain in the past.

The more a person is committed to a goal … the more negative compared with positive feedback will be efficient.

From a post titled “When Is a Negative a Positive?” on Freakonomics.com.

Ayelet Fishbach of the University of Chicago …

The more a person is committed to a goal — and by that I mean the more someone thinks that they absolutely have to do it, they like doing it, it’s important for them to do it — the more negative compared with positive feedback will be efficient”

Heidi Grant Halvorson, associate director of the Motivation Science Center at the Columbia Business School …

“Look, doling out negative feedback is not fun. It’s embarrassing. We feel terrible. We feel guilty.  So we love hearing, ‘Hey, maybe I don’t have to give negative feedback,’ ‘Maybe I can just say positive things!’  ‘If I just keep saying positive things, then somehow this person will work to their fullest potential and everything will turn out fine.’ And that just turns out to not be the case.”

Make sure that whatever you love doing is something other people don’t love to do.

Career advice from Steve Levitt co-author of Freakonomics

“Make sure that whatever you love doing is something other people don’t love to do. The worst thing in the world is to find some kind of job that everybody wants to do – like being a rock star.”

“You have to find something that is idiosyncratically something you love but everyone else despises. So if your dream is to be a garbage man, for instance, you’re guaranteed to have success in life.”